• What is abuse?
• Find Someone to talk to.
• Some places that can help.
• You have a right to....

YOUNG WOMANS PAGE

WHAT IS ABUSE?

Usually when we think of abuse, we think of physical abuse. Physical abuse can include pushing, slapping, kicking and punching.

"It all started with a lot of pushing and slapping. Then one day he pulled me by the hair and threw me down the stairs. When I came to, he was sitting beside me crying. I felt bad for him and afraid for myself."

Abuse can also be emotional and psychological. This kind of abuse is hard to see because it leaves no marks but it hurts just the same. Emotional abuse can include insulting, pressuring, threatening, isolating you from family and friends and being very possessive and jealous.

"In the beginning he phoned me almost ten times a day. I felt really special, but then he started hassling me about how I should do things, like what I should wear, how I should act. He started saying things about my friends, like who I should see and stuff about where I could go. For a long time I thought his jealousy meant he loved me."

Another kind of abuse is forced sexual contact and intimacy. It's your right to decide when and if you want sex. When your rights are ignored it can lead to harassment, physical assault and rape.

"The guy I went out with was very sexually forceful with me. He always wanted to have sex, even when I didn't want to. He'd just keep bugging me until I gave in. He always said that he loved me and if I loved him I'd love it too."

Abuse is hard to talk about but silence makes it worse. When you need to talk, finding the right person is not always easy but keep on trying. There are people who care.

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FIND SOMEONE TO TALK TO:

It helps if you find somebody who:

· Believes in you.
· Doesn't blame you.
· Doesn't judge you.
· Stands by you as you make your choices.
· Won't tell others what you have said unless you say it is ok.

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SOME PLACES WHERE YOU CAN GO FOR HELP:

· Friends
· School Counsellors
· Family
· Friend's parents
· Teachers
· Community Workers

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YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO....

· You have a right to develop into the woman you want to be without manipulation or pressure.
· You have a right to an education; learning without worry about your life.
· You have a right to be yourself. Find out who that is on your own.
· You have a right to be beautiful.
· You have the right to have fun and anticipate your future.
· You have the right not to feel fear and/or embarrassment.
· You have the right to wear what you want to wear, hang out with who you want to hang out with and feel what
what you want to feel.

Don't let someone else live your life for you. There is help. You are not alone. Please e-mail me if you need someone to listen and understand.

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